The Worst Business Advice I’ve Ever Received

Listen to: Advice by Kehlani

I almost lost my mind
I left myself behind
I almost crashed and fell right from the sky
I took a chance on this
I took too big a risk
And now I'm left with pain to get me high

It's time to take my own
Take my own advice, take my own advice

In your career, heck, in your life, you’ll be given bucket loads of advice. Sometimes, it’ll make you re-assess your decisions, make you wake up feeling energized, and other times it’ll just make you cringe. Here’s my list of the worst business advice I’ve ever received.

1.     Take the first job you’re offered

Oh my. This is probably the worst piece of advice I’ve heard.

We are all in different positions and find ourselves in different situations throughout our lives. If you are going through a difficult financial time, have to take care of dependents, have massive amounts of debt coming out of school or there’s a terrible economic recession, being too selective can be detrimental…and therefore, taking the first job you’re offered may be your best course of action. 

If that is not the case…

DO NOT take the first job you’re offered (unless it’s your dream, what you wanted, fits the box for your goals, etc.).

To set the context for where and when I received this advice last, it was at a conference with a large audience of young female college grads. The rationale was that we do not have the right to be selective when choosing our first jobs because we have no experience and therefore, have nothing to offer…yet.

I think teaching young people this is problematic.

While I agree that we all need to pay our dues, that our first job will most probably be super unglamorous and we all need to lay the foundation for a solid work ethic, we all have something to offer. Young people may be inexperienced (relatively to senior folk) but they may be super knowledgeable in a certain technology, a platform, more creative, speak more languages, know the world in a different context, and more…and that is all value. I mostly struggle with this advice because I have never had my guy friends receive this advice. We don’t tell young men to pick the first job they’re offered. We tell them to get multiple offers and pin them against each other to get the highest salary, benefits, perks, titles, and more. Taking the first job that comes your way is a mistake – if you are doing so out of fear or if you’re selling yourself short.

Kat Note: I turned down 6 jobs upon graduating from business school. It made my parents a little crazy but I knew my worth and it allowed me to put my fear aside to ultimately get to a position that I was very happy at.

2.     If you want to [get promoted / succeed / be taken seriously], you should be more flexible… 

Whether you are the expert in the room up for promotion or a new member of the team, flexibility is always something others will want from you, if it benefits them. It’s crucial to look at your situation and understand that while you may be up for promotion or be a newbie, negotiations are a two-way street. What are you giving up to be flexible? If what is being requested of you isn’t so bad, then be sure to bend and snap, in order to make the other party happy, and ultimately benefit from that relationship.

Most of the time, however, it’s not as black and white.

I think about internships – not the structured ones where you know that X number of interns are promised a job offer because of the deals the universities make – but the ones without any sign of future employment being a possibility. A lot of the time, interns are pushed to their limits with a hanging promise of something that is probably not even possible for the company – they just want you to work hard for free or at a low cost. Take the internship, not because of what’s to come, but what you’re gaining during your time there. Similarly, when you are working, it may seem OK to be flexible and do what the other party may ask of you because you are afraid it will hurt your promotion or because you’re new; however, if you have to go out of your way to an unsustainable point, being flexible to get what you’ve ultimately been working towards / deserve, is allowing others to take advantage of you. Understand that you are always in a position to negotiate and have the other party be flexible.  

Promotion, for instance, is a big one. “Do X, if you want to get promoted”. There are times to be flexible and promotion is certainly a time when you’ll want to play your cards right but if you’re up for promotion, it’s because you’re doing a great job – and no employer wants to lose a promotional talent. “Be careful, you are new…” is another one. While being new is always tricky because you have to prove yourself, your new employer probably had a tough time finding you, and guess what, they need to also prove to you that you made the right choice in selecting them.

Flexibility is a two way-street – it depends on what you want and how you negotiate, and it’s not black and white. Be tactical with your words and understand when to be what.

3.     Unsolicited advice

My 20s have been filled with people giving me advice I never asked for. I don’t know what it is…Sometimes I think I have a question mark on my forehead but I’ve learned to not receive unsolicited advice if the situation allows me to politely advocate for myself (i.e. I’m actually OK, thank you). It can be tough because superiors may want to mentor you or build a bond, and in that case, welcoming unsolicited advice is fine. In most cases, you have to hear your boss give your unsolicited advice – it’s respectful to do so. I have many friends who are Mr. or Mrs. Fix It, though. It’s how they communicate and show they care. I can’t say I like it, but knowing when to say “I just need you to listen, I’m not looking for advice”, is key. Similarly, adopting that mindset and asking others “Are you looking for advice, my thoughts, or someone to listen?”, is good practice. It will help you not resent the words of others.  

4. Your career and your life resemble that of a ladder

Umm…your life may resemble that of a ladder but I no longer strive to climb this imaginary ladder only to possibly fall. Also, what is at the top of this ladder??? Haha. 

The moments when I have felt most empty are those where I’ve planned my life and measured my success by steps in the form of a ladder.

I was fifteen when my vocal coach told me that I was being a control freak and to relax. She asked me “Would you be happy with a Grammy? Is that what you’re working towards? What’s the step that would make you happy?”. She instead had me begin to think of my life as a bubble.

 Imagine yourself living in a bubble. Your bubble is your life and contains all of its pieces. The goals you have, those are things you attract and work towards to bring into your bubble. The people in your life? They’re also in the bubble. There’s something you need to let go of? Take it out of your bubble.